I have no voice... yet again. It never fails: every single break I get, I'm somehow sick. This time, like whenever the weather changes, I have laryngitis. That means that I sound like a mouse that went to an Ozzie Osbourn concert and screamed all night. Or just kind of horse in any shape of the word.
And the thing that ticks me off the most is the fact that I talk. I'm quiet around people I don't know, but I'm a talker. I will talk about just about anything. And to save my voice, I can't talk. Because right now, I can't speak hardly above a whisper. A horse mouse whisper. That went to an Ozzie concert. And screamed. A lot.
And, on top of that, too, I think I also have somekind of cold. My head hurts. Which is nothing new. I mean, every time I turn around, I have a headache. So, yeay.... Not to mention, my throat is kind of sore, but I think that that goes along with the laryngitis.
I don't mean to sound bitchy, but really this is the only forum that I can "talk" in . And I want to talk. Every time I try to talk, Iget told to hush, and to save my voice so I don't compeltely lose it. Although, I've never completely lost my voice. I think that it might be kind of fun to actually lose my voice -- I mean, not even be able to talk; having the voice completely and utterly gone. But then, I really won't be able to talk at all -- and that would really frustrate me to no friggin' end. Because I'm a talker once you get to know me.
And I feel like I'm rambling. And I probably am. But this is the first all day that I've gotten to speak fluidly. And by speak, I mean, having you read.
And you want to know what else is weird? I can hear the sound of my voice in my head as I type this. It's so strange. It kind of feels like one of those movie voice-overs where the main character is narrating the story for the audience -- like they don't already know, right? Right. I mean, why do they do that? After all, the audience should know what's going on because they're watching it. Or at least, they should be.
Alright -- back on task. What was my task...? Or, more specifically, what was I talking about again. Because the whole hearing myself in my head thing is really kind of creepy. It's distracting. I think I'm having hearing my own voice withdrawls. Which is... equally as strange. I think that I might be a little freaky. Or, maybe it's just the loads of medication I've been taking to fight the cold that's currently warring in my body, fighting and slaughtering each other, slaying cells and virus alike. Wow... that was... darkly poetic. Maybe I should write when I'm sick more often. I actually kind of like that. Or, at least, I should write when I don't have a voice because I don't censor myself as much then. I can't talk it through outloud, so I just write it, regardless of how it sounds.
I need to stop thinking so much.
Or maybe not. Maybe thinking is actually a good thing. After all, I have some of my best ideas while I'm thinking. Some of them aren't so great, but most of my ideas aren't bad.
But that kind of goes without saying, ne? I mean, don't most ideas start with someone thinking about something? Generally, that's how it goes.
There are really times that I confuse myself. And that really worries me. I mean, how many people can say that they confuse themselves on a daily basis? Because that's what happens. I either over think something, or I don't think something through enough.
And, darnit, I really have to stop typing because I'm really starting to hear myself in my head, and bloody hell, I'm annoying.
No comments:
Post a Comment